Having Tea with Me

I wrote this at 2am. It was a horrible experience that I managed to capture on paper.

Over-encumbered

Depression is your enemy
A horrible state of being
A creature that takes
Takes away your senses
Takes away your worth
Your lust for life and love for others
Puts you under the illusion
That you are alone
Nothing, a burden to others
Makes you forget how loved you are

Tonight, I forgot everything
I forgot my strength
My will
My love
I abandoned everything
Convinced that all would be better
If I were absent
My mind clouded
My eyes blinded
And my ears deaf

Deaf to my friends' kind words
Blind to the love expressed
Growing angry at all who tried
Unreasonably annoyed
I shut down all communications
I disappeared
Thinking I was doing right
When I really have done wrong
I pushed them away
They didn't deserve that

No one deserves such treatment
When all they did was lend a hand
I felt lost
Wandering in a deep trench
No sound, no light, just nothing
Wandering alone and frightened
Trapped forever
I allowed myself to wander
Deeper and deeper
Making the situation worse

No hope
I failed, I will wither
I opened my eyes
There is light all around
I have awoken
Aid has come at last
In the image of my man
Pain visible on his face
From seeing mine
I realized I must be strong

I must be strong for him
Please don't be sad
I want you to be happy
Wipe away your tears
Smile for me
Willpower returns
I care for him more than myself
Depression slithers back in it's crevice
Replaced by my beating heart
Filled with undying passion

Love for friends and family
All whom hold my heart
I am selfish
Life isn't pain, it's rich
Life is what you make it
And I make life worth living
I love you all
With every fiber of my being
I am grateful to have you
And I always will

Written by: Julianne Micheletti 05/05/2015
Edited: 05/21/2015